Sunday, April 5, 2009

Kings (another TV vs life analogy)

Recently a new TV series started called "Kings." It is billed as being loosely based on the story of David. It should have been billed as being "LOOSELY!!!!!!!!" based on the story of David. It does have some interesting concepts as far as modernization of the story. Such as, Goliath is the name of a type of tank, that appears to indestructible, used by the enemy. Of course in the opening episode, David destroys a Goliath tank and instantly gains national recognition as a hero. After that, things really get to be "loose" in the comparison of the stories. At times I am intrigued by the story line. At other times I become incredibly irritated at the twisting and misrepresentation of the story. It is at those times that I find myself assuming a "holier than thou" attitude and condeming the writers for their perversiveness in telling the story. I also catch myself thinking, "What about the viewers who are not familiar with the actual story? Will they think that this is the way the story is in the Bible? Are they being mislead in thoughts about Christ and Christians?" Then it struck me, or maybe I should say God struck me with the realization of the situation. How is that different from the people who watch me? How much have I, do I, misrepresent our Lord. How much perversion do I bring to the story in my life. What about those who are not familiar with the story of Christ and mistakenly look to me to tell that story thru my actions as a professing Christian? Am I a child of the King of kings? Or am I just a court jester?

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Geezer Pants

An interesting (at least from point of view) thing happened to me a couple of weeks ago. Kay was out of town for the weekend and I found myself with a rare Saturday with nothing on my schedule. So I decided to go shopping. That in and of itself is highly unusual, but it was to be the first step of little journey. I had seen in the paper that my tailor (J.C. Penney's) was having yet another sale and decided that would be my launch point for the latest installment of my unending quest to find a pair of gray "khaki" pants. As usual, when I entered my familiar hunting ground, I found the style of pants that I was looking for in every conceivable size but mine. By this time I had fully dropped into hunter mode and was on the prowl. So I ever so stealthily moved on to the sale table. It was there, in this fertile corner of my hunting ground that I came upon a pair of corduroy pants. Having worn the cords off my last pair, I immediately locked in on the one pair of corduroys on the sale table. I eased up, slowly reached down, turned over the tag and EUREKA! they were my size! I snatched them off the table so fast, that the pair of pants laying on top of them barely moved, well at least if you count them flying into the air but still at least partially landing on the table as barely. I "sprinted" (I'll deal with that topic in another blog) to dressing room. As I tried them on I found the word "wow" going thru my mind. They fit great in the waist and hips and the length was perfect. I had successfully located, stalked and bagged my prey for the day! I AM MAN!!!!!!! As I stood admiring my conquest in the dressing room mirror, I noticed that these pants didn't feel quite like my other pants. Something was amiss. It was in a good way, but nonetheless, something was different. Then it hit me, as I had started to fasten the button on the pants, I recalled that the pants seemed to "give" or stretch a little. Upon further inspection, I discovered that the pants had elastic in the waistband on both sides. I was standing there in a pair of GEEZER PANTS! I was dumbfounded. I didn't know what to do. I froze, just standing there staring into the mirror, trying to process the events of the last few minutes. I was in no mans land. Do I uphold my manly pride? I'm only 52. That's way too young for geezer pants. Do I put them back and continue the hunt? They fit so well, feel so good. A bird in the hand........ As I changed backed into my jeans, the deciding factor appeared before me as clear as the sun on a cloudless day - a little pink sticker that said - $14.99!!!!!! Were they gray? No. Were they what I originally set out hunting that day? No. Did I need another pair of "khaki" colored pants? No. Were they $14.99? YES! Were they geezer pants? YES. Were they $14.99? YES!!! Am I ready to be an old geezer? No. Am I ready to admit to being a young geezer? For $14.99, YES!!!! So here I am with a new pair of corduroy pants for the great price of $14.99 that were originally marked $39.99, having saved enough money for one day of greens fees. Yes, I am man! And more than that, I AM GEEZER MAN!!!!!!!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

I'm "Lost"

Last night was the season premier of "Lost" ..oh yeah! woohoo! that's what I'm talking about!... I will confess to being a fan of "Lost" and of course that made last night pretty blasted awesome. For those of you who are out of the "Lost" loop, last season ended with the island being moved. How do you move an island...oh silly you, you just send someone into the freezing basement to turn the old move wheel! What happens when you move an island? Well, you get people bouncing around in a time/space continuum. If you don't watch the show, right now you're going - "What? That's the reason I don't watch the show!"

Which brings me to my scary conclusions: For years I have repetitively endured my daughters continuous exclamations of "Your weird!" - I have for decades had incredibly weird dreams at night (something that I have passed on to my daughter - take that for calling me weird ) - but even in all of my decades of weirdness, I have never even scratched the surface of the weirdness that is a constant in the show "Lost" - it makes me concerned for the people who actually write the show! - How can a group of like twisted minds find each other and actually make a living and develop a following using their hall of fame level of weirdness? As I was watching the show, my mind kept bouncing back from "this is stinking awesome" to "this is even weirder than I could have ever come up with!" Then it dawned on me that I was only one of about a gazillion (slight exaggeration) people who were watching the show AND loving it! How could this possibly be? We(I) are (am) undoubtedly "Lost"!

How could the weird become so normal? How could such a completely illogical, confusing story line become so popular? How can we wait with the utmost anticipation for months to be caught up in something that makes no sense and is so totally warped?

Maybe the answer is: the same way we get caught up and swept away in this world and tend to ignore, put down, leave behind(or whatever you want to call it) the love that Christ has for us and wants us to share with others.

Now that's weird AND lost!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Obligatory '08 review - '09 plans

The beginning of another year seems to take on more importance with each new one, must be a getting old thing! Actually it is probably me taking 52 years to get my head out of my rear end enough to see things for a lot more of what they are in real life.

First the not so fun review of 2008 - you might want to skip this paragraph.

Looking back at this past year, 2008 was what I can best describe as a roller coaster from hell. The year started with Kay (my awesome wife) battling breast cancer. Surgery, chemo, radiation were all tough, but facing the realization of possibly her not being in my life sent me to a level of fear that I cannot even begin to put into words. I really do not have a clue how people who do not have Christ in their life as their savior make it through such times. During the whole cancer battle, Kay was phenomenal! Her courage, strength and faith were awe inspiring. The "roller coaster" swung back toward the heavens when Kay was diagnosed as cancer free this fall! This year also saw my daughter Allie graduate from high school and go off to college. This was like one of those little rise and dips on the roller coaster that, once you quit throwing up, you laugh about how fun it was. In '08, I learned that I not only loved my wife, but am in love with her as well. We got to spend a lot of time together and I loved that part. Then school started back. Kay went back into teaching first grade, which means not getting home until sometime between 8 and 10 each night. Then I came out of coaching retirement and took on the interim head cheerleading coach position (a whole 'nuther post), which put me home a lot later most days. So much for time spent with Kay. God decided that it was time for me to do what He had called me do and help plant a church in Oak Ridge. I was a little slow on the uptake, and He had to "take the velvet off the hammer" in order to get my attention. It meant leaving a church where we had served for several years and I had gotten comfortable. So God made sure I was uncomfortable enough to quit doing things my way and do them His way.The roller coaster finally pulled back into the platform and here I am getting off that ride.

So what is the this year's ride going be like. For starters, the cancer is behind us (hopefully and prayerfully forever)! That makes for a great start! The Ridge Community Church is in the pre-launch stage and picking up speed for a March launch!!!! The "transition" of me becoming the cheerleading coach should almost be complete for both me and the girls on the team, so things should pick up speed there as well as the wailing and gnashing of teeth subsides. It appears that this year's ride isn't going to be one that starts with a long, slow climb up a steep track, but more of one where you get shot out at full speed right from the beginning.

So I start 2009 by holding on tight, praying A LOT, and trying real hard to not scream like a little girl!!!!!

Here is my "Personal Growth Plan" (refined -aka snobbish - way of saying new year resolution) for 2009:

1. Daily quiet time/prayer time and Bible study.
2. Read 15 books this year (read 14 in '08)
3. Attend one church related conference.
4. Visit 3 churches.
5. Compliment Kay each day, Allie each day that I see/talk to her, and one other person each day. (I really, really suck at this!)
6. Maintain a body weight of 185-190
7. Get my body fat % to 15%. (Same goals last year - I went from 192 to 195, 22.5% to 23% body fat - going in the wrong directions -aghhhhhhh!
8. Walk at least 3 miles each week
9. Get cholesterol under 180
10. Help make The Ridge Community Church a church that puts a smile of God's face!!!!!

Feel free to hold me accountable for, challenge me about and/or harass me unmerciful about these goals during '09.

This fulfills my obligatory year in review/new year plan blog! Feel free to wipe the tears from you keyboard if it bored you to tears. In all seriousness, I pray that God touches you in a way this year that both fulfills you and more importantly brings you closer to His plans for you! Amen!

Wednesday, December 31, 2008


Welcome to my first blog post!!! I have finally decided to give in and try this, although I cannot envision anyone being overly interested. But trust me when I say that "stranger things have happened!" I do not intend for this blog to be a place to dispatch profound nuggets of wisdom. I do intend it to simply be an outlet for my thoughts - you should consider that as a warning!! If no one ever reads the blog, my time will still be well spent in that at least my wife won't be trapped (as often) into suffering through my ramblings/mumblings/etc.

What you need to know about me - in the words of my college age daughter - I'm weird! I cannot say that the assessment is unfounded. Things about me that justify that description; I am a conservative democrat, that hates politics/political parties and am just as apt to vote Rep., Dem. or Ind. - I am one of only two Seattle Seahawks fans in the state of Tennessee that I know of (surely there are others) - I am an old fart (52 yrs. old) that enjoys hanging with the youngin's more than most people my own age - I am head over heels, madly in love with my wife Kay (we've been married 25 years and I love her more now than ever!!!) - I am a pastor - I am a high school teacher - I am a high school assistant athletic director - I am a coach (interim high school head cheerleading coach- I told you weird was justified) - If you picked up my ipod (oh yeah, I love tech stuff) you would find December Radio, NewWorldSon, Todd Agnew, Vitamin String Quartet, a number of Vivaldi concertos, Willie Nelson, you get the idea - weird! - I love sports - I love to play golf (22 handicap) - I asked for and got a King David's (kinnor) Harp for Christmas - No, I am not mucically talented - I love to read, especially when I walk - This could go on for a lot longer, but I'm sure you get the picture.

So let the fun begin and blogs flow! Of all the things that I have experienced in my 52 years, this will surely be one of them!!!